Sometimes life gives you lemons.... I am for sure making lemonade or even how about a lemon chiffon custard :)

I wanted to give a quick update of everything that happened to me and my family on Monday. I actually have been feeling quite bad for a week. I've had a severe headache and was concerned but just hoped it would go away. On Monday night I had loaded the kids in the car for soccer and was trying to put the keys into the ignition when I began seizing. I remember very small tidbits... shaking in the front seat, my brother Konnor at the door, and then the paramedics. So in a time span of 10 minutes i remember less then 3 seconds. But this is not normal for a seizure, normally you remember nothing and no not come out of it for 10 minutes and on.

I have to look back at the whole situation as a COMPLETE MIRACLE. Seriously what if I had been driving with all of my kids? My siblings Starr, Sharwan and Konnor had been staying at my house and all were home. I KNOW IT WAS BY DIVINE APPOINTMENT! I know that the Lords hand was in everything and helped everyone to be safe in the situation. I will be forever mindful of the Lords hand and of his love and concern for my family!

While I was seizing Taylor sent Skyler into the house to get help. Skyler ran into get help and yelled to Konnor "Something is happening to Mom!" They ran outside and Konnor ran to the car door then sent Sky to get Starr. Sharwan came out to the car followed by Starr.I was convulsing in the drivers seat. Starr and Konnor pulled me out and carried me to the back of the car, I began foaming at the mouth. Sharwan then called 911 and they realized the ambulance was coming so they did not need to drive me to the emergency room. They then layed me onto the grass. Then Konnor and Skyler ran to the neighbors to get help. When they got back my convulsing had stopped and I had passed out. I stayed passed out for about 1 to 1 1/2 minutes. When I woke up I was still very out of it and had extremely slurred speech. I demanded I get the kids to soccer and soccer pictures I fought Starr and pushed and started to stand up. Then Konnor grabbed me and made sure I could not stand up. From this point it took roughly 3 to 4 minutes until the paramedics arrived. At this time we had a lot of neighbors here to help. I remember talking to the woman paramedic who was giving me a choice to ride in the ambulance or get a ride from my family? How bizarre is that???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????  I must of sounded ok but I definitely was not all there. At that exact time Bryson had the impression to call . He was on a work trip in Minnesota and I was scheduled to go out for my first time on Thursday :( Sharwan returned Bryson's call and Bryson was able to take charge of the situation and tell them to take me directly to St. Marks. They decided on st. marks because of the cat scan/ mri/ and the specialists and the fact that it is closer the the University Hospital.

As I drove all the way to St. Marks I was all there and the paramedic talked tome all about seizures and explained tidbits of why my seizure was not "normal". I remembered small mili-seconds of it and I came out of it and started communicating. This was also the reason they wanted to "look for something else". Sweet Starr followed in her car and I could see her the whole drive.

I had tremendous treatment and care while in the ER. They took blood and did a CT scan and saw a mass so they then did an MRI. I knew something was up when the MRI tech asked me a million questions about what happened, so i was slightly prepared for some type of news. My father in law Tom and my parents quickly came and entertained me :) When the results of of the MRI came in my er Dr came in and turned off the TV and backed up to the wall, clearly she had news and it was not that good. she very simply said she had seen a mass probably a tumor in my brain and that she would let the Neurologist come in and explain further. We waited about 30 minutes for the neurologist and it was clear he was not on duty when he came in. He explaining out of all the tumors to have this was a very good one. It does not appear to be cancerous and is the size of a quarter or smaller. I may have had this for years or longer? They will not know for sure of if it is cancerous until it is removed. It is in the left side of my brain about 2 inches above my ear. This is in the speech center of my brain, which is the bummer. So they need to do a lot more tests to verify it is in the speech center and if they are correct (which I am sure it is because words are not coming out that easily) the operation will be will me awake so I can communicate as they touch different parts of the brain and they nay not be able to remove the entire tumor? To me that is the only scary part :) Today my neurologist is presenting my case to the Huntsman Tumor Board and he is assuming they will agree with him (he was at Huntsman for 10 years) and have my operation at Huntsman Cancer Institute. He is going to need to research and as he said "get all his ducks in a row" for my surgery. This is quite rare and his estimate is I will have surgery in 2-3 weeks. He has asked me to be patient, which I will try to be.

There was actually 2 earlier little seizure episodes but they only occurred verbally. Roughly 4 months ago I said a prayer and the correct words simply could not come out of my mouth, once I said amen I made sense again. But I was scared by it and joked that I had had a brain aneurysm and after Taylor's surgery I said something to bryson that did not make sense but knew it did not make sense and would not repeat it. The Dr guesses that this was a seizure but only in my brain. The one good thing is that I now know I was not loosing my mind haha!

I was only in the hospital for 1 day. And since I am on anti seizure medicine I have not had any physical seizures. But I am still having them in my brain. Which means a loss of words or absent of thoughts or even kinda zoning out for a few seconds. It is super strange to not feel like myself and even a little frightening. I feel quite horrible. My body is thrashed, worst then any sporting event. My muscles and joints kill and are super soar. I am able to walk am supposed to get my body back but I can not be left alone. I am not allowed to drive obviously. And I can not lift anything heavy/myles :(

Another true miracle occurred while I was at the hospital. A dear long time friend of ours is a Dr at st marks Greg Anderson he stopped in to visit me and then pulled my parents into the hall. President Thomas S. Monson (the prophet of the LDS church) was scheduled to visit him in another location earlier that day but had to cancel and was going to try and stop by st marks later. Greg had told President Monson about me and we hoped I would get to see him. I was released and President Monson was visiting Dr Greg so I waited in Greg's private office with my parents and every sibling but Season (we miss you but know you were there in spirit). President Monson came in shook each of our hands and then sat next to me. He talked and told lots of funny stories. He thought my name was humerous and kept joking "Where is winter?" He then rubbed my hand for ten minutes as he talked. After 25-30 minutes he gave me a blessing. I will remember the spirit I felt for the rest of my life. He left my healing in god's hands but said he would be on my left side and my right side. He then said that he was sent there specifically for me. Once the blessing was over he said I was pretty, then said I should not say that but I'm an old Navy boy :) and he kissed my hand. I WILL NEVER EVER FORGET THE LORDS TENDER MERCIES AND THAT HE KNOWS ME AND IS AWARE OF ME!

My kids have been amazing truly inspirations. I'm sure we will all go through our own moments but they are strong and we are going to be positive through everything. Bryson is such a great pillar of strength I am so blessed to have him! He hoped on a flight home from Minnesota as soon as he could to get home to be with me. And now for the first time ever he gets to totally take care of me :) he is ready to be hot nurse! I am choosing to only have positive thoughts and words. I will be just fine. I WILL MAKE IT THROUGH THIS and be back to the same old summer soon. I know I have been blessed, guided and even supported by Heavenly Father every step of the way. He has been on my right hand and on my left! And I am so grateful for his love and support!

I have to thank everyone for all the help love and support. there is truly no way I would name names. My family has taken over. I have received endless texts, emails, phone calls, visits of love and support. And they have meant the world to me.

I am a strong girl with endless faith and I am positive that I will make it through this. Maybe I'm just being turned into a diamond and that is going to take some serious work :)